Oddly enough... I forgot about it. Completely out of my mind until this morning. When I had the strangest thought upon waking up...
I need to tell people that I don't want the bible to be part of my funeral or memorial service.
When my mother died, I didn't know what her wishes were. Neither did my sister or brother have a clue. We didn't have a clue what she wanted for burial. Or what music to play. Or what she'd like to wear. And tons more that I didn't know or didn't think of. Like having her rosary with her in the casket. Which in hindsight, since I bought it for her in Italy, I'm glad that I have it to remember her.
Through the process of planning the service... I strove to put my needs aside and focus on what I knew would be right for her memory... in other words... I asked myself would this please her if we did it? If it pleased anyone else... that really didn't matter, but sometimes it was icing on the cake. Like the fact that my sister asked that Ma wear a vest she made her for the previous Christmas. Well, certainly I believed Ma would like that. And when an annoying friend of her offered to loan us her rosary to be in the casket with Ma... I think Ma would have liked it.
What Ma would have liked at her funeral... that's what was important. It didn't matter that she was dead. This was about her first and foremost... she was the reason that all those family and friends were there. They were second.
See... I don't want the bible to be part of my memorial service because I don't read it. Can't remember the last time I did. I also don't go to church. It is not part of what I do. So, to me it's an integrity thing... sure, I'm dead... but if people truly want to honor my life... doing things like reading from the bible is not the way to do it and be in integrity with how I lived my life.
My hope is that my loved ones will respect me enough to honor this wish of mine. Just as I really strove not to dishonor my mother's memory.
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