Powerful beyond measure

"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. "

The above are the first two sentences of a frequently used quote of Marianne Williamson. I've come across it many times. Yesterday, I came across it again. This time, I asked myself... have I ever been powerful beyond measure?

Someone, apparently a part of me... said yes.

I was like... REALLY????

Apparently, I wasn't aware of it.

January, 1990... I was on a college trip to tour Italy and Greece. Our last day in Rome was a free day, no tours, no museums, no schedule. So I hopped on a train and rode a couple hours to the East. Then I took a bus ride for about 20 or 30 minutes. And stepped off into a small village in the mountains. The village my great-grandfather was born.

November, 1990... I came out as a gay man. (Do I need to explain more?)

June, 1996 or 1997... Pridefest in Milwaukee... and I celebrated by being an artist and with oil pastels I made an 8 feet by 8 feet mural of what pride symbolized to me. (my hands were sore for days... but well worth it)

August, 2001... I attended a men's weekend called the New Warrior Training Adventure, and despite exhaustion and illness from heat, humidity, and a sleepless first night... I had an experience of incredible authenticity and connection with other men, most of whom were straight.

June 2002... I moved to Indianapolis and moved in with my partner... whom at the time I only knew for less than a year. We've been together for almost 9 years.

Those are just five examples of when I was powerful beyond measure. I just didn't know that I was.

Each time...

I stepped out of my comfort zone and took risks.

I dared to do something I had never done before.

I forgot to care about what anyone else might judge about me.

I made choices... not based on any facts... but on what felt right for me. One might consider that... a type of integrity.

These moments are ones I will always remember. And I suspect that is a big clue to find other moments where I was powerful beyond measure... look for the moments that I will always remember.

Powerful beyond measure... yeah... beyond measure. It is a sense of empowerment that cannot be objectively analyzed with numbers and statistical formulas.

Powerful beyond measure is about authenticity... and my authenticity comes from trusting, loving, accepting, and blessing myself. I can't put numbers on that. And there's other things involved with me being authentic... like intuition, integrity, inner wisdom, boundaries.

So, this morning... I wonder... I now know I've been powerful without measure often in my life. And I wasn't even aware. It has been when I made choices out of my authenticity. So... I wonder...

NO... I'm imagining (and one might say if I can imagine it, then it is real)... how awesome life will be now that I'm aware that I can be "powerful beyond measure".

Freaking sensational.